Blah.

I’m not sure why, but I’m thinking about him so much more now. The last two days, he has been constantly on my mind. I don’t know if it’s because Brandon rejected me so naturally, I would go back to him, or just because I miss feeling like that or because I actually miss him. I think about who is is now and I don’t want to be a part of that.  But thinking about who he was last year or who he is when he’s alone with me makes me want to talk to him again. I know I can’t, I know it’s not healthy. I thought I was done. I really did. I mean, I blocked his number. I don’t even go on his facebook anymore. We haven’t talked in over two weeks. We’ve only seen each other once and didn’t even look at each other. So why is he on my mind? Am I that unhappy that I’m going back to something comfortable? Am I that unhappy that I want a solid reason to blame my unhappiness on so I want him back in my life so he can treat me badly? I don’t know. All I do know is that I am unhappy and he needs to get out of my head.